Who needs a lawyer? Suitable for printing.

Note: The Irish are way ahead of us.

Living Will Form

I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish
to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.

Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead
politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives
depended on it. Nor in the hands of lawyers/doctors who are interested
simply in running up the bills.

If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one
of the following:

Bloody Mary,
Margarita,
Scotch and soda,
Martini,
Vodka and Tonic,
steak,
lobster or crab legs,
the remote control,
bowl of ice cream,
the sports page,
chocolate,
or sex

...it should be presumed that I won't ever get better.

When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed
person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and
call it a day.

At this point, it is time to call a New Orleans Jazz Funeral Band to
come do their thing at my funeral, and ask all of my friends to raise
their glasses to toast the good times we have had.

Signature: ___________________________

Date: ___________________________